Learning to live with chronic pain
Reaching toward the phone on my bedside table—a halfhearted effort to silence my alarm before it riles the cats further—I am reminded that today will be another spent in pain and discomfort.
Radiation in the mix
I was going to expound on how today’s oncology appointment was one of the most important of my journey so far, but I realized...
My neck, my back, my tumours and my cracks
Living with cancer is like burning a candle at both ends. One wick is the gentle fire of life. As it melts away the...
On the map, but off the trail
Within the confines of the small examination room, Shannon and I nervously await the arrival of my oncologist. Although there’s always plenty riding on...
I’m not Just a Tourist
Nine months ago, I wrote a reflection called Am I Just a Tourist? after thinking about my relationship with illness as it relates to...
See Spot. Run.
“You’ve done this before?,” asks the CT Technologist. I nod, making a classic white-people-making-eye-contact-by-mistake face. You know the one: The spiel begins. “So, you...
No Evidence of Disease
For my 35th birthday, the Ontario healthcare system gifted me an oncology appointment: my first since finishing chemotherapy less than a month ago.
I officially received word that I'm in the NED stage of my my cancer treatment. No evidence of disease.
The truth is, I’m tired.
Dealing with cancer since February has been exhausting. As I approach my final few rounds of chemotherapy, I can't help but wonder how long the exhaustion will last.
Will I ever find my energy again, or am I doomed to be a husk of my former self?
Am I Just a Tourist?
I've been reflecting a lot on a powerful quote from author Susan Sontag. It may be familiar to some, but it's especially fitting as someone who's going through a cancer diagnosis (as she was when she penned it).
"Everyone who is born holds dual citizenship, in the kingdom of the well and in the kingdom of the sick. Although we all prefer to use the good passport, sooner or later each of us is obliged, at least for a spell, to identify ourselves as citizens of that other place."
Will I get back home?
Susan Sontag, from Illness as a Metaphor
A Liminal Space
It's been tough to provide an update because, in truth, nothing much has changed. I'm supposed to start treatment this week.